Sometimes I manage to seem like a completely normal person (stop laughing). But occasionally, I go into full freak-out mode.
Increasingly, large groups of people (or even small but dense groups) cause me enormous amounts of stress. The phenomenon seems to have been getting worse since high school, and I’m probably starting to avoid certain places and events because of it. Most recently Disney World triggered this response. I’m fine if I’m distracted (but that gets harder the larger the crowd), but in general I hate crowds. The noise, the movement (or lack thereof), it all just feels like pressure building up in my head.
It probably why concerts don’t really work for me anymore. It might also explain why I’m avoiding bars and clubs more and more (that and getting old). I wonder if this is just a symptom of getting older in general?
I hear ya. I can still do concerts, but even then, I’d much rather be in back or up in a balcony and able to just hang out and not get caught in the crush of people all pressing toward the stage. And what I wouldn’t give to find a bar in NYC that was relatively quiet and uncrowded so that I could enjoy hanging out with people and not have to spend all my energy avoiding other people’s drinks, elbows, etc. and shouting so I can be heard. What get’s me really freaked out is being in a crowd that is all doing the same thing – as much as I loved Rocky Horror Picture show, the idea of being in a crowd all shouting the same thing and doing the same things always made me uncomfortable, ditto for some political rallies I’ve been too. Something about the group-think that gives me the creeps.
We’re just getting more and more anti-social in our old ages. I’m afraid to think how grumpy and misanthropic we’ll be in 20 years! 🙂
On a bit of a tangent: have you read Cory Doctorow’s Down And Out in the Magic Kingdom? Coming from your time spent at Disney World, you might enjoy it. (Though spending time in the belly of the Mouse is certainly not required to enjoy the book.) It’s available online for free at Doctorow’s website.
I hear ya. I can still do concerts, but even then, I’d much rather be in back or up in a balcony and able to just hang out and not get caught in the crush of people all pressing toward the stage. And what I wouldn’t give to find a bar in NYC that was relatively quiet and uncrowded so that I could enjoy hanging out with people and not have to spend all my energy avoiding other people’s drinks, elbows, etc. and shouting so I can be heard. What get’s me really freaked out is being in a crowd that is all doing the same thing – as much as I loved Rocky Horror Picture show, the idea of being in a crowd all shouting the same thing and doing the same things always made me uncomfortable, ditto for some political rallies I’ve been too. Something about the group-think that gives me the creeps.
We’re just getting more and more anti-social in our old ages. I’m afraid to think how grumpy and misanthropic we’ll be in 20 years! 🙂
On a bit of a tangent: have you read Cory Doctorow’s Down And Out in the Magic Kingdom? Coming from your time spent at Disney World, you might enjoy it. (Though spending time in the belly of the Mouse is certainly not required to enjoy the book.) It’s available online for free at Doctorow’s website.